November 13, 2016

cutting edge

this is not working for me
this living arrangement
to which we both agreed but
somehow ends up
cheating us both out of our happiness.
your brutish way of addressing reproach
is enough to break any smile
even so it pales by comparison
to your sluggish decision process
and don't even get me started
on your randomly erratic behaviour
or your out-of-the-blue finger pointing fits.
I seem to remember
you appreciated honesty when we first met
but I now realize you were never
on the cutting edge of this sword
because truth is defined as such
only when it validates your cause
otherwise it's called rebellion.
and I know I have my shortcomings
(I am imperfectly human
some flaws are to be expected)
I am loud, stubborn and foul mouthed,
I have a short fuse and high standards
and I hold myself up to them every day
when my head hits the pillow,
I push replay and physically cringe
to the stupid shit that I say.
good news though,
I also have the balls to admit all of this
and sometimes I even change for the better
when I need to adapt and commit.
keep that in mind the next time
you're about to ask me for compromise
without owning up to your end of the bid.
last but definitely not least
in this long mismatched flaw list
we can add the difference in views:
looking at empty spaces
I'm seeing angles, poetry and quality of space
and you're measuring square meters.
and that, love
is exactly the reason why
when you add it all up and divide it by us
we're both on the losing side.

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